After a cancer diagnosis, it’s not unusual to have questions swirling through your mind. How far has the cancer progressed? What is the prognosis? What will treatment be like? How will my family and I cope?
Often, questions about sexuality go on the back burner. It’s easy to understand why, when so many other issues may take priority. But keep in mind that sex is an important part of life. There’s no reason for your sexual relationships to stop just because of cancer.
Cancer and its treatment can have a huge impact on sexual function, even if the reproductive organs aren’t targeted. So it’s best to ask about your situation before your treatment begins.
Below, we’ve listed some questions you might consider asking your cancer care team. While not all of them will apply to you, they might trigger other questions you haven’t thought of. Be sure to bring a pen and some paper to jot down the answers. You might also have your partner or a trusted friend or relative go with you to your appointment. It can help to have a second set of ears, just in case you miss something.
Finally, don’t hesitate to ask questions, especially if your healthcare provider doesn’t bring up sexual health. Some people feel awkward discussing sex, but it’s entirely reasonable to wonder how treatment will affect your sex life.
We suggest that you print out these questions and put a mark next to the ones that apply to you. We’ve also included space for you to write down your own questions and answers at the end.
General
- What are the sexual side effects of this treatment?
- Will I be able to have sex the way I used to?
- What should I do if my orgasms change?
- What should I do if I lose interest in sex or have difficulty becoming aroused?
- How might this treatment affect my sex hormones (e.g., testosterone and estrogen)?
- Will I have to stop having sex for a period of time? (If so, when can I resume sexual activity?)
- Are certain sexual activities or positions recommended over others?
- Will sex feel different?
- Will it hurt?
- Can you recommend some books or websites, so I can learn more?
For Men
- Will my erections change?
- Will I have erectile dysfunction (ED)? If so, will it be permanent?
- What ED treatments would be best for me?
- Will I need penile rehabilitation? What does that entail?
- Will my testosterone levels decrease?
- How does prostate cancer treatment affect gay and bisexual men?
For Women
- What is surgical menopause?
- Will I experience vaginal dryness?
- If I have trouble with lubrication, should I try a lubricant or moisturizer?
- Would hormone replacement therapy be an option for me?
- Will surgery or radiation change the shape of my vagina?
- Can vaginal dilators help stretch my vagina?
Body Image
- How will cancer treatment change my appearance?
- Where might I find items like wigs and breast forms?
- Can plastic surgery help me? oHow wi
- Should I consider prosthetics (such as prosthetic testicles)?
- What can I do about surgical scars?
Partners
- What should my partner know about sex and cancer?
- Can my partner “catch” anything through sexual contact?
- Is it safe for me to have sex if I’m having chemotherapy or radiation therapy?
- Is help available for partners?
- Should my partner come with me to therapy?
- I’m single. When should I tell a new partner about my cancer treatment?
- Will this treatment affect the way I speak, eat, or socialize?
- Will this treatment make it more difficult to kiss my partner?
Contraception
- If pregnancy is no longer a concern, do I still have to practice safe sex?
- What type of contraception is best for me?
- Can I use hormonal contraceptives?
Pregnancy and Fertility
- Is it safe for me (or my partner) to become pregnant during my cancer treatment?
- Will I still be able to have children?
- Can I freeze sperm or egg cells for future in vitro fertilization?
- Where can I find reliable information about surrogacy?
- Where can I find reliable information about adoption?
- How can my partner and I cope with infertility?
Emotional Health
- I’m feeling very anxious about the future. Should I talk to a counselor?
- Can you refer me to a counselor in my area?
- Can you put me in touch with a support group or other patients who have had this type of cancer?
Your Questions
|
My Question |
My Doctor’s Answer |
Learn More
To learn more about cancer and sexuality, these links can help:
The Effects of Cancer on Women’s Sexuality
Cancer and Sex for Single Women
How Does Cancer Affect Men’s Sexual Health?
Fertility Options for Men with Cancer
How Does Prostate Cancer Treatment Affect Gay and Bisexual Men?
You can also find information by searching for a specific term on our site.
You may also be interested in...
Other Popular Articles
What Is Jelqing, and Does It Actually Work?
The term “jelqing” refers to a set of penis stretching exercises that some believe can make the penis bigger. Although the practice has gained attention and popularity in blogs and internet forums in recent years, there is no scientific evidence that it is an effective way to permanently increase the size of one’s penis. In fact, in some cases, jelqing may actually cause damage to the penis, so it is a good idea to get all the facts before setting off to try it.
What Is Sensate Focus and How Does It Work?
Sensate focus is a technique used to improve intimacy and communication between partners around sex, reduce sexual performance anxiety, and shift away from ingrained, goal-oriented sexual patterns that may not be serving a couple.
What Is the Average Penis Size?
If you have ever wondered how your penis compares to others in terms of size, you are not alone. Many men are curious to know how their penises stack up compared to the average. Unfortunately, general curiosity can sometimes give way to full-on obsession and anxiety about penis size. This can be an unhealthy and often unnecessary fixation, especially because most men who think their penises are too small have perfectly normal-sized penises.
Can Sex Reduce Menstrual Cramps?
The SMSNA periodically receives and publishes ‘guest editorials.’ The current article was submitted by Mia Barnes, a freelance writer and researcher who specializes in women's health, wellness, and healthy living. She is the Founder and Editor-in-Chief of Body+Mind Magazine.
Having sex while you experience menstrual cramps is healthy and can provide significant benefits. While it might not be the first activity that comes to mind when your PMS or period cramping begins, many people enjoy sex to reduce menstrual cramps, experience increased pleasure and benefit from other advantages. Learn more about having sex while menstrual cramps are happening and how it can help your body.
The Effect of Regular Aerobic Exercise on Erectile Function
Erectile dysfunction (ED) is the inability to achieve or maintain an erection sufficient for satisfactory sexual activity. As men get older, their erectile functioning may naturally decline due to changes in testosterone levels, cardiovascular functioning, and the potential development of other chronic medical conditions that become more common with age.
What Is Edging and Why Do People Do It?
Edging is the practice of stopping sexual stimulation before reaching orgasm to prolong a sexual experience. The term stems from the concept of approaching the metaphorical “edge” of orgasm but stopping before going over the edge.
