Common Reasons Why People Seek Sex Therapy

Common Reasons Why People Seek Sex Therapy

Sex therapy is a specialized form of counseling aimed at addressing sexual concerns and improving intimacy for individuals or couples. It provides a safe and confidential space for people to discuss their sexual issues and work towards achieving a healthier, more fulfilling sexual life. Understanding the common reasons why individuals seek sex therapy is essential in destigmatizing the process and encouraging open conversations around sexual well-being. The following are some reasons why people may pursue sex therapy.

  1. Communication Issues and Mismatched Libidos: One prevalent reason individuals seek sex therapy is communication breakdowns surrounding sexual desires and preferences. Mismatched libidos, where one partner has a higher or lower sex drive than the other, can lead to frustration and tension within a relationship. Sex therapy helps couples develop effective communication strategies and effectively deal with mismatched libidos, fostering an environment where both partners feel comfortable expressing their needs and desires.
  2. Erectile Dysfunction and Other Sexual Dysfunctions: Sexual issues, such as erectile dysfunction (ED), orgasmic disorders, and performance anxiety, can significantly impact an individual’s self-esteem and relationship dynamics. Furthermore, there are rare conditions that are difficult to diagnose and don’t have established treatment options such as hard-flaccid syndrome, post-finasteride syndrome, and post-orgasmic illness disorder. A skilled sex therapist can create a supportive space for individuals or couples to explore the psychological aspects of these concerns, often by offering practical strategies to improve sexual function and addressing underlying or developing anxieties that can further worsen intimacy.
  3. Past Trauma and Sexual Abuse: Individuals who have experienced past trauma or sexual abuse may encounter difficulties in establishing healthy present day sexual relationships. Sex therapy, often in collaboration with trauma-informed approaches, can help survivors navigate their emotions, rebuild trust, and develop coping mechanisms to overcome the impact of trauma on their sexual well-being.
  4. Questions Regarding Sexual Identity or Orientation: Questions or concerns about sexual identity or orientation can be sources of stress and confusion for individuals. Sex therapy offers a non-judgmental space for exploration and self-discovery, helping clients navigate their feelings, understand their sexuality, and find acceptance.
  5. Desire to Enhance Intimacy: Many couples seek sex therapy not necessarily due to sexual problems, but as a way to enhance their intimacy and connection. Sex therapy provides a platform for couples to explore new aspects of their sexual relationship, learn more about each other’s desires, and develop a deeper emotional and physical connection.

Seeking sex therapy is a proactive and positive step towards addressing and resolving sexual concerns. By understanding the common reasons individuals seek sex therapy, we can promote a more open and accepting dialogue around sexual health.

Whether dealing with communication issues, sexual dysfunction, past trauma, identity concerns, or simply aiming to enhance intimacy, sex therapy offers valuable support and guidance for individuals and couples on their journey to a healthier and more satisfying sexual life.

For more information on this topic, please read these publications from The Journal of Sexual Medicine:

Internet-Based Brief Sex Therapy for Heterosexual Men with Sexual Dysfunctions: A Randomized Controlled Pilot Trial

What’s New in Sex Therapy


McCarthy, B. W., & McCarthy, C. (2007). Rekindling Desire: A Step by Step Program to Help Low-Sex and No-Sex Marriages. Routledge.

Althof, S. E., & Meston, C. M. (2014). Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy for Sexual Dysfunction. Routledge.

Maltz, W. (2002). The Sexual Healing Journey: A Guide for Survivors of Sexual Abuse (3rd ed.). HarperOne.

Kleinplatz, P. J., & Menard, A. D. (2007). Beyond Sexual Orientation: Integrating Gender/Sex and Diverse Sexualities via Sexual Configurations Theory. Sexual and Relationship Therapy, 22(1), 25–43.

Schnarch, D. (2009). Intimacy and Desire: Awaken the Passion in Your Relationship. Beaufort Books.